Natassja Dodd

The Delayed Train

What is considered to be performance? Can every day life be a performance? Does a performance require acting or is it as realistic to life as possible.

The 10:54 from Stockport to Sheffield which arrives at 11:34 gives me exactly 10 minutes to change over to catch the 11:44 to Lincoln Central. That means I have ten minutes to get from one end of the platform, to the stairs, over the bridge, down the other set of stairs and walk to the very end of the platform to get to 4B. Usually that is possible even with the herds of people you have to make your way through.

Except most of the time the 10:54 to Stockport is late so the average time I have is about four minutes. The last journey I caught the train was fifteen minutes late. This resulted in me missing my connection and then having to wait an hour in Sheffield station.

That’s a hour to entertain myself while sat in a cold waiting room.

Can my actions be considered a performance?

If Schechner states that “every day is a performance?” the why can’t it be?

It is a solo performance as I sit there with my luggage and answer text, scroll through Facebook, listen to music or flick through Netflix. It involved no conversation except those through text. Are my audience the other passengers waiting for their different trains that lead them to a destination that will continue their day? Their own private lives?

I think the train station waiting room is an incredibly interesting place as there are so many individual lives and backstories all sat in one room for a limited amount of time. It’s like a short glimpse into these peoples lives and I don’t know what their name is, who they are or where they’re going. One may be carrying a guitar which makes me assume he’s a musician or he could be bringing it to his son he’s only allowed to see on weekends for a fourteenth birthday presents. A woman with a dog, an elderly couple sorting out their tickets. It’s fascinating to try and piece all of these stories together but never truly knowing the answer.

FIRSTS THOUGHTS 

I spent a lot of time debating whether to take this module as there was and still is an initial feeling of doom when the thought of performing in a space entirely on my own and everything is reliant on me, myself and I.

The reason I decided to take this module is to push myself out of that comfort zone and security of working in a group. To get over the feeling of vulnerability and proceed with confidence in my work.

When thinking of my final performance I knew I wanted to include my love of singing.

A few ideas have been floating around in my head but taking inspiration from the recent movie La La Land and the character of Mia. Her determination as she struggles as an actor in a world of competitiveness.

It was the audition scene that I took a lot of inspiration from and her journey throughout the film, mainly  in her determination through attending all of these auditions and facing the constant rejection.

Relating this back to myself as a drama student and now leaving university with the daunting choice of what to do with the rest of my life. The pressure of how the ideal dream is of being an actor is not considered to be a secure and stable job and whether you pursue or sacrifice the dream is the decision you have to make.

Personally I can’t ever imagine myself sitting behind a desk filling out paperwork or answering phones. I will do what is necessary to accomplish my hopes but there’s only one chance so why not try and if I fail, I fail. I can at least say I tried.

I like the idea of the process of rejection after rejection and how casting agents and directors will cut you off without a care even if you’re in the middle of the song or the first sentence of a script. It’s the brutality of the way this system runs that I find interesting because sometimes you get the rare moment that instead of the word ‘No’ or ‘Next’ it’s a ‘Yes’.